In our postmodern world and ever-adapting culture, the concept of (and even the word) “obedience” is offensive to many and rejected as “oppressive” or “dictatorial.” Sometimes the discontent toward that subject even makes its way into the church and into Christian homes. Yet, the Bible gives clear instructions where obedience must be practiced in the Christian life. But is there ever an exception?
The Bible tells wives to obey their husbands. This can be pretty unpopular to mention in a wedding ceremony or marriage counseling, but Scripture is very clear. “Wives, submit to your own husbands, as is fitting in the Lord” (Col. 3:18; cf. Eph. 5:22; 1 Pet. 3:1). “Older women” are instructed to “admonish the young women to…[be] obedient to” (NKJV) or “subject to” (NASB) “their husbands” (Tit. 2:3-5). Is that in all circumstances? Or are there any exceptions?
The Bible tells children to obey their parents. These verses are regular reminders to kids at home: “Children, obey your parents in all things, for this is well pleasing to the Lord” (Col. 3:20). This is essential for children as they “Honor [their] father and mother” (Eph. 6:1). Are there any exceptions to children obeying their parents?
The Bible tells church members to obey their elders. Again, in our society today, even Christians push back against this, but the Bible terminology is even stronger on this. Not only are we to “respect” our elders and “esteem them very highly” (1 Thess. 5:12-13, ESV), we are to “obey” them and “be submissive” (Heb. 13:17). These are not optional requests but are required commands. But, are there any exceptions?
The Bible tells citizens to obey their civil rulers. Even under the tyrannical Roman emperor Nero, Christians were commanded, “Let every soul be subject to the governing authorities” and not “resist” (Rom. 13:1-2). Rather than considering this to be optional, “you must be subject” (13:5). “Submit yourselves to every ordinance of man for the Lord’s sake” (1 Pet. 2:13). But, again, are there any exceptions?
It’s interesting that humans seem to always be looking for the exception in rules and instructions. In these cases above, God gives ONE exception to the commands of obedience and submission. When commanded by rulers to stop preaching the gospel, the apostles affirmed, “We ought to obey God rather than men” (Acts 5:29). The ONLY exception to wives obeying their husbands, to children obeying their parents, to church members obeying their elders, to citizens obeying their civil rulers is if such would cause them to disobey God. Obeying God is foremost (cf. 1 Cor. 7:19b)! But, if it does not violate the law of God, then one must obey.